Dating

Dating Sites People Over 50

Today I wanted to take a moment to talk about the fear of dating online.

I’m writing this post because I was having a conversation with a friend of mine who has been single for the last few years. She has shared with me that she is really lonely and doesn’t want to be alone as she gets older. But she simply hasn’t met anyone yet.

I can relate to how she feels. Finding yourself single in midlife can be difficult. And putting yourself out there and dating again can be really scary. Especially if you have had a partner for a good part of your life.

love
Endless Love by Alfred Gockel / This beautiful art is courtesy of allposters.com (affiliate link)

My suggestion to her was to do what I did, go check out some dating sites for people over 50.

Her reaction was very negative. The thought of meeting someone online was scary for her. She was worried that it would cost a lot of money or she would put herself in danger.

I explained to her that there are many free dating websites that are really good. There are two free dating websites in particular that I really liked. One of those two sites, OKCupid, is where I met the man I am dating. The other free website is called plentyoffish.com.

The thing I really like I about these sites is they have you answer questions. It is sort of a survey. There are questions related to life, sex, religion, politics and relationships as well as other things. It is really important to answer all of the questions honestly. You will be given potential mates, based on how you answered the questions.

Sample question: Do you like cats? a) Yes! I have cat(s) b) no I’m allergic c) I don’t own a cat, but I like them. d) I hate cats.

The way it works is when someone goes to your profile they can read your questions and answers, but they can only read the ones they have already answered. If they want to read how you answered a question, they need to answer it first.

There is also a place where you can write comments to explain your answer.

If you have found yourself single in midlife, now may be the time to join a dating site. You don’t have to meet anyone you don’t want to. Get online and start checking out some profiles, maybe even chat with someone. Then if you feel comfortable with someone, you can arrange to meet them in a public place like a Denny’s or a Panera Bread.

I know that dating in midlife can be so scary. But it is so worth it. You never know, you may meet your new prince charming, like I did.

Here are 5 top dating sites people over 50:

OKCupid

Plenty of Fish

Ourtime.com

eharmony

match.com

 

 

 

Dating, Online Dating

Be Successful With Online Dating

After being off the market for over 25 years I found dating in my 40’s to be very intimidating. I was excited, yet hesitant. But once I got out there I realized dating is actually a lot of fun and it is pretty easy to be successful with online dating.

For me online dating was very helpful for several reasons. First I was able to find out who in my area was available. This would have been very difficult otherwise. At our age it is difficult to find men who are single. The other thing that I totally love about online dating in midlife is that you have time to really get to know someone before you meet them for the first time.

The men that I have dated, I emailed or text-ed with them for a week or two before deciding to meet. And then once I decide to meet, I always make it in a public place like a coffee shop. This way I am not putting myself in any sort of danger or risk. And by the way, I have yet to meet anyone that is creepy. All the men that I have met have genuinely been looking for a match.

As you are getting comfortable with dating in midlife you need to be confident. Please know that you are amazing and there is a match for you. After leaving a unhealthy marriage it took me several months to gain my confidence back…I mean the last time I dated was back in the 1980’s. And I was 100 lbs lighter and had fewer lines and wrinkles… But guess what? The men out there are just like us. They have also aged. They don’t expect perfection.

And one of the things that I have noticed about the mature male (at least the ones I have met) is that looks don’t really matter as much as you might think. Okay, it is nice to be attractive, but it isn’t important to men that you have lots of makeup or have the perfect figure. Most of the men I have dated tell me they prefer a natural woman.  I once had a man tell me that he preferred me without makeup. He wanted to know when he kissed my lips and my face he wouldn’t taste make up. To me, this was a very sexy thing to say. After hearing this comment from him, I knew I was going to be getting kissed. But secondly I realized that I was attractive without my make-up and it really helped to put me at ease and help me relax.

Remember to be realistic. Just like you, no man is perfect. You simply will not find the perfect man. But you may find that person who gives you butterflies in your tummy or someone who shares many of your interests. I look at dating as a sort of interview process. You are screening people in order to find the right match. And that is one of the nice things about dating sites.

Most sites have questions or surveys that you take that help figure out the perfect match. And I have to tell you I have found this very helpful. I have had great success with some of the matches that my dating site and found for me. I was lucky to find a few people that I have good chemistry with pretty quickly but sometimes it takes time. Just take it slow and don’t rush love. I suggest relaxing and focus on enjoying yourself. When you find the right one, you will know it.

I have had success with online dating, and I’m sorry, but I’m not quite ready to share just yet. But I will tell you online dating is fun and it works.

If you are looking for love in midlife, like I am, I sincerely wish you all the best. Please feel free to share your experience here.

You also may want to read Online Dating Success Secrets for Women 40/50+ (An “Online Dating for Women” Guide – How to Find True Lasting Love Online). Yes it is possible to find love online.

Dating, Online Dating, Women's Issues

Deciding to Join Online Dating…

I just joined a dating site. I’m not quite ready to jump out there and start dating lots of guys, but I would like to have a chance to start talking to members of the opposite sex.

After being separated for over a year, I just feel like I am ready to get out in the world again.

So I joined a dating site as a way of getting my feet wet. In case you have never been to a dating site, the first thing you need to do is fill out a profile.

This was hard for me, writing about myself and trying to describe the kind of person ID-10069423I am. Then I wrote about what I was looking for in a man. This was much easier. Then of course probably the most important part is uploading a picture. For me I tried to put up an image of myself where I was smiling and also where I look as normal and natural as possible.

Then, depending on the site, you choose what you are searching for. For me it is a male within an hour drive between the ages of 48 and 60.

Then the systems with find similar people to what you are searching.

I enjoy looking at the pictures and reading the profiles of men. It really is fun. I am not yet comfortable with emailing them or connecting with them, but I’m sure it will be easier.

I have noticed many different kinds of men looking for different things…and this has me really re-evaluating what it is that I want.

Many men are looking for a serious relationship. You know a wife, someone to settle down with. And one day I do too. But now, no I don’t want something too serious.

Then there are the men who are just looking for a friend to hang out with and if there is a connection then intimacy. This is also known as friends with benefits. This sounds the most interesting to me, but boy scary. I mean what happens if I meet someone who I really connect with and I lose my heart in the process?

Then there are the men who are married or not married and they just want sex. That obviously isn’t for me.

I am finding online dating exciting and scary.

I’m smiling to myself as I write this as I know I would never in 100 years ever thought I would join a dating site. But I guess it is the new way to meet men.

If you have ever used a dating site, I would love to hear about your experiences. Were they good or bad? Is there anything I should be concerned about?

Dating

Midlife And Dating

Many women and men find themselves single during midlife. And just like anyone else midlife’s find themselves lonely and wanting companionship.

Dating is a fun and exciting time. You get to meet people and enjoy the company of the opposite sex. You have the opportunity to meet some really neat people or you may even find your soul-mate.

But many older people who are joining the dating scene are often coming out of long term relationships. It can be intimidating putting yourself out there and being available after being with the same person for many years.

More and more people are using the internet as a tool to find companion. Sites like Match.com make it easy to find potential candidates. Sites like Match.com give you a chance to look at the profiles of people who are also available. You get to see pictures. Find out where they live and read about their likes and dislikes. It gives you a chance to see if you have and the person have something in common.

I like that dating sites give you a chance to get your feet wet. Meaning you don’t have to meet the person right away. First if you want, you can email them, talk on the phone or meet on chat sites like Skype.

If dating online remember you are still dealing with a stranger. So if you meet someone face to face it is a good idea to meet in a public place. Don’t allow someone to pick you up at your home on the first date.

I know of many people who have had success with dating sites. What about you? Have you used a dating site? Or do you think you would, if you haven’t?

Match.com