Midlife Divorce

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Midlife Crisis Divorce

A Midlife Divorce can happen for a number of reasons.

  • Midlife Crisis

One reason would be the result of either you or your spouse going through a midlife crisis. A midlife crisis can be devastating to a marriage.

Midlife Divorce

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When a midlife crisis happens the “normal marriage” is literally turned upside down. And anyone who has a spouse go through a midlife crisis you know that they are going to do what they want to do, no matter how you feel or what you do. During a midlife crisis they find themselves being very selfish. You simply need to observe and detach and you need to wait it out.

Or do you? I decided that after 3 years of my husbands midlife crisis and us losing our home because of his quitting his job that I had had enough. And I made a decision to separate.

  • You Grow Apart

I think this is the most common reason. Over the years couple begin to lose their connection with each other emotionally and sexually.

Many couples realize this after their children grow up and move out. They discover that over the years they lost touch with each other and now have nothing in common. Or maybe they are just bored. Or maybe now that the kids are grown both adults have different ideas of what their future looks like.

For example the wife may be excited about the freedom of not having to take care of anyone anymore. She can be a bit selfish and find a new career or hobby. But her husband thinks that she should focus on him.

Sometimes couples have been unhappy for a very long time and hung in there for the kids. Now that those kids are grown, they feel like it is their time to move on.

  • Infidelity

This really ties in with growing apart. But unfortunately an affair can  happen in marriages for different reasons, including boredom, lack of sex in the marriage and midlife crisis. When it happens the is no undoing it. And many marriages can’t survive.

4 Comments

  • Bill says:

    Hi Wendy, I ran across your site here after reading one of your comments inside WA. I found your ‘Midlife Madness’ URL intriguing and decided to check it out. Maybe the fact I’m in that category had something to do with it…ya think? Your divorce article here highlights the most common reasons people suffer through a midlife separation, and I was wondering if you’ve considered authoring a follow-up article that might help people avoid the unhappy ending. I divorced many years ago and never remarried, so it’s a little late for me. But a subsequent article full of tips and suggestions might be just what the doctor ordered for someone on the verge of separation. Love the layout and color scheme here, and the header is wonderful. Great work! :-)

    Bill

  • Wendy K says:

    Hi Bill, Thank you so much for the suggestion and the compliments. I really appreciate it. I think it is a good idea to do a follow-up story. I am hoping to help others here that are going through all the stuff us mid-lifers go through.~Wendy

  • MICHELLE says:

    I have come over here from WA too and also loving your blog. There are also some great programs you could endorse too.

  • pJ says:

    Hi, Wendy
    I totally agree with this article on midlife crisis and divorce. I came so close last year to making several of those above mistakes.. I quit my job and transferred to another location which help me overcome several issues that were making a mess of my marriage and family time. Things are not perfect and we are getting marriage counseling, but, things are better. Lots to overcome yet. My husbands health issues make it tough but, it could be so much worse. I think as I become less selfish and focus on my family and spouse that things will continue to better themselves. It is hard yet. We grew up with TV showing us that our marriage in our 40’s would be a Leave it to BEAVER or a Happy Days world and it is just not so.
    Particularly because of the points you have made here is the very reason marriages fail and TV paints a picture that excludes those vital points.
    so, I suggest, yes, a job change if it is possible or moving to a new location could also spice up a faltering marriage if both mutually agree and think it will be conducive to the marriage. And of course marriage counseling for ourselves, but, not to point out the faults of our spouses.
    Thank you for this post. All the best to you. PJ

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